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Comments So Far: 21

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  berkeley1 year, 2 months ago

  without the onion, we would have missed this great event: cnn and its siblings decided it wasn't newsworthy.

  all praise to the onion!

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  tehranchik1 year, 2 months ago

  You 'ed better all keep your fingers crossed we don't wake up to gw's face on a dollar bill.

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    scriblerus11 year, 2 months ago

    I heard Karl Rove's planning on a strategy to put GWB's picture on the dollar bill. That will be his second national practical joke. Under Shrub's picture will be the motto: "What, me worry?"

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      ETproductions1 year, 2 months ago

      I'd like to see them carry that strategy through very quickly. You see, one of the rules regarding whose picture can be on US currency is that the individual must be dead.

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      Shadowolf1 year, 2 months ago

      Reminds me of that pic in The Nation that showed LeShrub ala Alfred E.Neumann with the caption "WORRY".

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  Beau78901 year, 2 months ago

  I heard Gen. Grant on NPR this morning, agreeing with Gen. Washington.

  Said Grant, "Fetch the president a whisky! Only the delirium tremens could make a man this moody and fearful."

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  Neophile1 year, 2 months ago

  The Onion hit a home run with this one. This is a great example of satire that cuts through the BS. Sometimes the court jester tells more truth than the king.

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  scriblerus11 year, 2 months ago

  I like the dig at the end: "remove her from the mantle of King George." That's-a-goooood!

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  Obaku1 year, 2 months ago

  The truth is that although George Washington never fought a duel in his life (quite an accomplishment for a Virginian aristocrat of the time), he might reconsider if faced with the current crop of scalawags and knaves in politics today.

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  texangelwings1 year, 2 months ago

  Wow, good one, Neophile, thanks I needed this this morning. Better than a cup of coffee. The onion did a great job on this one.

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  elzorro21621 year, 2 months ago

  Onion rules!

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  joeeddie1 year, 2 months ago

  I liked this story even though The Onion has it slightly wrong. George Washington did not break a 211 year media silence as evidenced by the recently discovered Roosevelt Papers. This was Washington's dissertation about FDR and how he abused the unwritten rule that was written by Washington himself - No man shall serve more than two terms as President of these United States. Washington further explained: "We created this country to flee the dictatorial abuse that any king eventually embraces. This FDR fellow, in a time of war, has taken advantage of the poor, downtrodden and huddled masses to form a less perfect union. He has promoted a socialist ideal and fear itself is his weapon. If he lives through this fourth term, I anticipate that he will win a fifth term by showing everyone what is really under that blanket on his lap."

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  Amazing11 year, 2 months ago

  These should be harsh words for the frat boy who has had the effrontery to compare himself to George Washington.

  We can only hope that Washinton's words will not fall on deaf ears.

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  2sidestoeverything1 year, 2 months ago

  Neo, good one LMAO!

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  aceofspades11 year, 2 months ago

  Wow Onion almost got the whole story ...but there is more - the Delaware River Swift Boat Veterans Assoc is challenging Washington's self promotion in that he had an artist at Trenton over glamorize his ferry trip. Further more, Dick Cheney threatened to challenge him to a duel, But GW said he would not take a chance on Dead Eye Dick shooting Martha

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  WCFIELDS1 year, 2 months ago

  Sun Tszu was interviewed for this story but when asked about the Bush Battle Plan in Iraq severely injured his side laughing hysterically and was removed to the local hospital.

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  ret25usn1 year, 2 months ago

  I really enjoyed this one. Thanks to Onion and the poster.

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  crespi1 year, 2 months ago

  Washington gave a battlefield speech specifically condemning torture as something Americans shouldn't do.

  Bush changed the laws, to torture American citizens for suspicion.

  Washington would pistol-whip Bush in a heartbeat.

  Where's "Samantha Stevens" when you need her to conjure up George Washington again?

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    Shadowolf1 year, 2 months ago

    A new article has Andrew Jackson looking for GWB...

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  TWarrior1 year, 2 months ago

  He must have forgotten how they tried to castrate him. Of his handling of the Revolutionary War. It's amazing what a person will forget in 211 years. Ah yes History.

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